...'I can mount on wings like eagles' and soar'

I love how God sends us little messages just when we need them. They come in all different forms and often times- probably most of the time- we totally miss them, but if we pay attention and keep our hearts open to him they'll always find their way to us. 


This morning on my commute to the office I was feeling pretty nervous and anxious about a meeting I had today and in the midst of those fleeting thoughts of self doubt a song came on that seemed to say the exact perfect thing that I needed to hear. 


I carried it with me all morning in anticipation of the conversation I was so anxious about, letting it serve as my open conversation with God to please give me the confidence I was so lacking in that moment. 


And, of course, he totally delivered. He always does.

...teach us to number our days.

I read this story a few weeks ago about a man who estimated the number of Saturdays he had left in his lifetime. He then put that number of marbles into a giant jar in his office and each Saturday he would take one marble out. In doing so he learned to live his every Saturday to the fullest- to never waste it- not even one. 

That's how I feel about my time with Jackson. I know that no matter what I only have a finite number of moments with him, a finite number of days and nights of him living in this house with Dan and I. Like it or not the day will come when our little man will move out to make a life on his own. So in my heart I am counting my marbles, making sure to not waste a single minute that I have with him. 

'Teach us to number our days aright, that we may gain a heart of wisdom' -Psalm 90:12

This week that we've had together has been pure, untainted time for just he and I. We have had offers for playdates and for outings with friends and family and while they all sounded great I selfishly and politely passed. This week was for us. For Jackson and me. Because his days as my only baby are soon coming to a close.

The past few days have been a good balance of exploring and also getting things organized and back in order... they tend to get pretty thrown about in the chaos that envelopes us when we're in our daily grind of dual careers. But the beauty in seeing the world through his eyes is that every single thing has the potential to be fun. Every little thing is its own adventure. 

There were trips out to gather organizing tools that have been on our 'to do' lists- a new dresser for Audrey's ever-growing wardrobe, totes and baskets to organize all of the little things that come along with newborns, a few new learning tools and toys for JP. The eldest furry son went on a trip to get a much-needed bath, hair-cut and nail-clipping. There were a lot of tears when we dropped him off- Jackson must have thought we were leaving him forever- his love for Sammy continues to far out weigh Sammy's love for Jackson. 

The heat outside continues to weigh on unbearable, so we spent a lot of time playing inside.... with balls, puzzles, stuffed animals, books, crayons... you name it, we've played it.

Unfortunately JP is also getting quite a few new teeth at once. One of the downsides of toddler-hood. So there has also been a lot of cuddling and rocking and overall comforting. I'm trying not to think about how this teething thing is going to be a reality in our lives for the foreseeable future. As soon as JP gets through it Audrey will be picking up where he left off. 

Despite the 100+ temperatures, a lot of progress has been made on the addition. Again I am humbled at how essentially designing and building a house is like second nature to Dan. I would have absolutely no idea where to start when it comes to all of the intricate measurements involved, but he seamlessly just goes after it like it's no big thing. 

It's a work of love for him, really. We have been dreaming and planning all of this for nearly 4 years. Since the day we stepped foot on what would become our home together. Dan saw the potential right away. I had to be convinced. But he assured me that we would make this home into what we wanted, no matter what it took and now seeing that come to life is pretty emotional actually. To realize this dream together at such a young age is something we are both incredibly proud of.  

We're not just "adding on more room" and "renovating our house"- we are putting together the HOME in which we will raise our children. We are designing just for our family the perfect retreat to always end each day at, together. We are not only envisioning our future, but we are making it happen. One nail at a time, one board at a time, one step at a time.

As you can imagine, the high heat plus the fact that I'm now 6 months pregnant means that I'm really not a lot of help. So, I'm on "Jackson" duty, cold drinks duty, food duty and most fun of all, I am called out to make important decisions like "how far apart do you want these windows" or "is this how you pictured this layout" or "do you want the stairs to be opened or close?" 

  

The boys are hard at work outside and I can see my little man starting to move around in his bed, surely waking up from his nap. So, we're off for more adventures...  

Adventure Week: Day 1

This morning we woke up determined to fill the week up with adventures. With countless Mama/JP memories. With teachable moments, a lot of fun and even more laughs. And today did not disappoint. 

We started the day with Jackson's first trip to the Newport Aquarium. He LOVED it. He ran from tank to tank in complete awe of what was before his eyes. I have said it before and I'll say it again- watching him discover new things is one of the absolute most magical parts of being his mom. 

We saw fish of every kind, we talked about how they swim together in a "school" because they are family and family sticks together. We stood in the shark tunnel and I watched my little man fearlessly put his face to the glass, wanting to go inside and swim with what my adult mind perceives as one scary fish. We laughed as we watched the penguins put on their show, Jackson running alongside the front of their tank as they swam beside him. I held him up so he could touch turtles and splash in the shark tank.

We'll be back, many times, we have a pass for the next year. I love that I'll get to share more and more with Jackson over those visits. He craves knowledge. I love that. 

After the aquarium, a trip to the bookstore and a snack break overlooking the river we headed for home for nap time. About 10 minutes into our trip when we were on the highway I started to hear very unwelcome sounds coming from our car. I haven't had a flat tire since I was 16 (when flat tires were a daily event in my 1984 Grand AM piece of...), but there was no mistaking that is what was going on. I put on my flashers and waited for two lanes of traffic to let me pass to the shoulder of the road. Did I mention that this road is a major highway with way too many semi trucks and is NOT a place I ever want to be stranded 6 months pregnant with my baby boy? 

Once semi-safe on the side of the road I began to search for my AAA card. Of course the one time I have ever needed it I can't find it. Luckily Dan was to the rescue, he called from his office and a few minutes later AAA called me to confirm my location and to let me know they would send someone right away. And they did- they are amazing. They were on the scene in about 20 minutes. Unfortunately, we also had to wait for the police because the position on the road was just too dangerous for the AAA man (Lee) to change our tire without an officer helping to guard him from traffic. Well the police apparently don't move as quickly as AAA and we waited for over an hour and 15 minutes before an officer finally showed up. Long story short, Lee, our hero from AAA quickly changed our tire and we were back on our way. Many, many snacks, stories and goofy songs and games to keep Jackson a happy boy. Operation: Adventures Day 1 accomplished.

rest up, little man.

Rest up, my handsome little man. Tomorrow morning we are kicking off "Mama & JP's Adventure Week"... we have places to go, people to see, things to learn... it's going to be AMAZING!

Our blanket fort from earlier in the week- all you need for hours (in toddler time) of entertainment are blankets, the dining room table, your piggy pillow pet, blankie and a few snacks.