learning is hilarious.

flutter by, my butterfly

sneak peek...

tonight we had some family photos taken. here are a couple of 'sneak peeks' from the photgrapher, Sadie...

playdate: totter otterville

today in the spirit of continuing to pack as much in to my last week on maternity leave as possible, we hit up totter otterville...

style watch: jackson & audrey

One of the many, many simple pleasures that, for me, comes along with having babies is getting to DRESS them! I like to think of Jackson and Audrey as my own little chubby, adorable mannequins. Dan knows to just step back and let me pick out their clothes, otherwise, most likely I'll be peeling off whatever he has chosen and re-dressing them anyway... 


So, here is "what they wore" today. And, for my own personal amusement and to gush over for years to come when they are older and refuse to let me dictate their fashion choices, I'll be adding a page at the top of the blog to post "what they wore" whenever the mood strikes me. Enjoy!

Headband & socks: Target, Sweater: Gap, Jeans, Shoes & Tank: Old Navy

Shoes: Nike, Jeans: H&M, Long-sleeved shirt: Target, Button-down shirt: Oshkosh

slacker tenant.

Tonight, Dan and I were having a little "family meeting" and, of course, Jackson wanted to be a part of the conversation so we took the opportunity to ask the little moocher when he was planning on forking over some rent money...

I could have predicted this emotional mood I'm in months ago. Kicking off right on schedule, with less than two weeks left on maternity leave. That is less than two weeks left to spend every waking (and sleeping) moment with my babies.

I'm happy to be going back to work. Honestly, I am. I am grateful actually. To be able to get back into that environment where I am ruthlessly challenged, surrounded by some of the brightest minds I've ever known. To not be known as "mommy" but as a woman who is working, working hard, to fulfill her dreams and the dreams she has for her family. Grateful to be a living example to Jackson and Audrey of what can happen when you turn your drive and ambition into reality. A reality where you never stop learning, never stop challenging yourself, never stop growing.

So, it's bittersweet really. To leave those faces behind every day. I'll miss them like crazy, I will. My throat gets all tight just thinking about it and I've had slight emotional breakdowns both times we've had the new nanny come over this past week for mini leave-behinds. It's hard. Really hard. Hands-down, for me, the hardest part of being a mom.

But, the beauty of it is that Dan and I have laid out a very clear master plan for our family. I know, I know, that sounds OCD and very me and not so much him, but it works, I'm telling you. To know exactly why it is that you're getting up every day and leaving your family to go to work. Why it is that you put in the long hours and trudge through the really uncomfortable parts of leading  a home with two full-time working parents. If it's clear- as it is with us- then you can keep pushing through the hard times because you have an end goal that's not too far away in mind. That is priceless.

I see many deep breaths in my future. Many, many self-doubting moments. Many extra hugs and extra-long cuddle time with the babies over the next week and a half. But, all of the worries will surely be followed by a new chapter in our lives that is sure to please. I know God has us on this path for a reason, I know because I have talked to Him about it daily since I became a mom. And I know he's taking us to amazing places if we're willing to put our trust in Him.


And so we will. We will trust Him with all our hearts. So with that, bring it on, bring on every little thing you have planned for us.

the perfect day.

I have always had this very real sense of urgency when it comes to life- I want to LIVE it, big time. I don't want to waste days, I don't want to spend my time doing things that don't bring me alive... I want to really live. To really feel, to really experience this amazing world God created for us. This is why I created my first Life List around the age of 17 or so. The list has grown and evolved over the years with some items being checked off along the way. 


There have been some seasons in life when I have been able to check off many items, whereas it seems I have accomplished very few the past couple of years. My first instinct was to say, "oh, that's what happens when you have kids..." but I violently stop myself because what a lame excuse. I have always said- and believed- that having children should push you to do more instead of holding you back from living. I think they key is to have regular check-ins with yourself and with your family to make sure you're on track to making all of your dreams come true- otherwise the day-to-day will creep up on you and before you know it a month/year/decade has come and gone and what progress has been made on the dreams front? 


So, Dan and I took advantage of a few baby-free hours this weekend to have one of our regular check-ins. Our "Family Strategy Session" if you will. We updated our family master plan and we set some new goals for the remainder of this year: 5 for us as a family, 3 for Dan personally and 3 for me personally. We are now totally focused and determined to check them all off, living life more fully in the process. 


Since we only had a few hours for the conversation we really only covered our shorter-term goals, but this morning while JP was still sleeping and the Peanut was content bouncing away in her jump-a-roo I updated my own Life List, completely inspired by our conversation on Saturday and by my cousin who is running the Boston Marathon today (go, Aaron!). So, it is updated and I can't help but feel that sense of urgency stronger than ever, to cross things off, to experience these dreams I have on paper and best of all to do them with my favorite people in the world. 

friday night.