I read this story a few weeks ago about a man who estimated the number of Saturdays he had left in his lifetime. He then put that number of marbles into a giant jar in his office and each Saturday he would take one marble out. In doing so he learned to live his every Saturday to the fullest- to never waste it- not even one.That's how I feel about my time with Jackson. I know that no matter what I only have a finite number of moments with him, a finite number of days and nights of him living in this house with Dan and I. Like it or not the day will come when our little man will move out to make a life on his own. So in my heart I am counting my marbles, making sure to not waste a single minute that I have with him.
'Teach us to number our days aright, that we may gain a heart of wisdom' -Psalm 90:12
This week that we've had together has been pure, untainted time for just he and I. We have had offers for playdates and for outings with friends and family and while they all sounded great I selfishly and politely passed. This week was for us. For Jackson and me. Because his days as my only baby are soon coming to a close.
The past few days have been a good balance of exploring and also getting things organized and back in order... they tend to get pretty thrown about in the chaos that envelopes us when we're in our daily grind of dual careers. But the beauty in seeing the world through his eyes is that every single thing has the potential to be fun. Every little thing is its own adventure.
There were trips out to gather organizing tools that have been on our 'to do' lists- a new dresser for Audrey's ever-growing wardrobe, totes and baskets to organize all of the little things that come along with newborns, a few new learning tools and toys for JP. The eldest furry son went on a trip to get a much-needed bath, hair-cut and nail-clipping. There were a lot of tears when we dropped him off- Jackson must have thought we were leaving him forever- his love for Sammy continues to far out weigh Sammy's love for Jackson.
The heat outside continues to weigh on unbearable, so we spent a lot of time playing inside.... with balls, puzzles, stuffed animals, books, crayons... you name it, we've played it.
Unfortunately JP is also getting quite a few new teeth at once. One of the downsides of toddler-hood. So there has also been a lot of cuddling and rocking and overall comforting. I'm trying not to think about how this teething thing is going to be a reality in our lives for the foreseeable future. As soon as JP gets through it Audrey will be picking up where he left off.
Despite the 100+ temperatures, a lot of progress has been made on the addition. Again I am humbled at how essentially designing and building a house is like second nature to Dan. I would have absolutely no idea where to start when it comes to all of the intricate measurements involved, but he seamlessly just goes after it like it's no big thing.
It's a work of love for him, really. We have been dreaming and planning all of this for nearly 4 years. Since the day we stepped foot on what would become our home together. Dan saw the potential right away. I had to be convinced. But he assured me that we would make this home into what we wanted, no matter what it took and now seeing that come to life is pretty emotional actually. To realize this dream together at such a young age is something we are both incredibly proud of.
We're not just "adding on more room" and "renovating our house"- we are putting together the HOME in which we will raise our children. We are designing just for our family the perfect retreat to always end each day at, together. We are not only envisioning our future, but we are making it happen. One nail at a time, one board at a time, one step at a time.
As you can imagine, the high heat plus the fact that I'm now 6 months pregnant means that I'm really not a lot of help. So, I'm on "Jackson" duty, cold drinks duty, food duty and most fun of all, I am called out to make important decisions like "how far apart do you want these windows" or "is this how you pictured this layout" or "do you want the stairs to be opened or close?"
The boys are hard at work outside and I can see my little man starting to move around in his bed, surely waking up from his nap. So, we're off for more adventures...