"The son of God became a man so that men could become sons of God." -C.S. Lewis

We are off making as many 1st Christmas memories as possible with our little man- I couldn't be more excited to share with him all the magic that these days bring. From our family to yours we wish you a holiday overflowing with love, peace and joy. May every thing we do and every thing we say throughout these Christmas celebrations make Jesus smile. 

ABC and 123

This morning when Jackson woke up we began our normal routine... wake up, diaper change, then I sit him down by his toy cabinet in the living room to play while I let the puppies outside to go potty. Normally by the time I am back 2 minutes later he has emptied all of the toys out of the cabinet and is hard at work playing. But, this morning I came in to this...

 ... he had only pulled out his books and was "reading" away.

I was so proud. I have been working hard at making story time as fun as toy time for months.

He busied himself in his books for at least a half an hour. Meanwhile I was organizing our desk drawers and came across this little photo album that I had never used. One of those really thin ones meant to be carried in your purse. Then the idea hit me to make it into an "ABC and numbers" book for Jackson. Sort of like flashcards, but for use "on the go" with two big pluses - the sheet protectors make the cards unable to be torn and since they are in a book form he can't drag them all over the house which is one of his favorite hobbies at the moment. 

First, we gathered our supplies: the photo album, markers, card stock and a cutting device (scissors would have worked as well). 

I decided to change the "cover" of the photo album to a more interesting patterns. I cut off the cover of an old notebook and trimmed it to size. 

Our ABC pages! 

And numbers too...

A fun little project that only took about an hour, which isn't bad with a 10 month old "helping"!

Tonight marks the end to my first day on "vacay" as my Aunt Mary would say. My goal was to soak up as much JP time as possible and that I did. We were play-hard-rock stars- there were indoor wagon rides, snack bribes in exchange for wobbly steps, puppy-tail chasing, cuddle time, Christmas song singing, story time... you name it, we did it, we did it all out, and still managed to start crossing to-dos off my overly-ambitious list for my holiday break and met Dan for lunch. 


And now that I am getting ready to go to bed I can't help but think... this is what I have been missing out on. This is what I have been giving up every day while at work. All of this! I realize every mom probably thinks this, but my baby honestly is the cutest in the world, the smartest, the most adorable, the most hilarious... the most everything because he is my everything and my heart hurts tonight thinking about how much time I miss out on with him for my career. 


I haven't actually done this (or maybe I have), but I would bet that if you were to browse back through my blogging archives you would probably find a similar post to this every few weeks in some form or another. The "ugh, I just want to stay home with Jackson or at least not work so much" post. And if I'm blogging about it every few weeks then I'm probably thinking about it and feeling it every few days. It is honestly the hardest part of being a mom for me. 


The constant, never-ending, won't-go-away nagging I feel- the literal pull in opposite directions... most of which I admittedly bring on myself because I have this fatal flaw of needing to be the perfect mom, woman, full on life-liver. I realize that at the end of the day if staying at home is truly, truly what I want to do then I would be fully supported in that choice... but the problem is that it's not truly what I want. What I want is not to not have a career. I need that part of my life. It is a necessary for me, But the reality is that just because you want something, just because you need something, just because your life wouldn't be complete without it doesn't make having it any easier sometimes.  


So, I'll go to sleep tonight with a big, proud, happy smile on my face because I had the best day with my little man, knowing that we get to do it all over again tomorrow. And as for the mystery of how in the world am I ever going to crack the code on how to be at peace with being a working mom, well that one I am intentionally going to try and just push aside for at least this week. 


Sweet dreams!
Jessica

oh, ho, the holidays...

At this point in my life I can think of few feelings that out rank that of it being Sunday night and knowing that I do NOT have to work tomorrow. Tomorrow (and the next couple of weeks ) are fully set aside for the most important things in life- faith, family and friends. And that is what Christmas is all about. 

This weekend was a great kick-off to Christmas week. Last night we celebrated the marriage of two friends. Absolutely beautiful wedding! It's funny how God brings people into your life at different stages- some for long periods of time, some for short and some for multiple. Last night we were blessed enough to be surrounded by a lot of friends who have been a part of our lives for a very long time and it reminded me of the roles each of them have played and the memories that come along with that. It was a reunion of sorts. 

This is JP's impression of his Daddy this morning. Lets just say that Dan had a good time last night. A really good time that resulted in a lot of dancing and strangely enough he must have caught some version of the "flu" this morning that left him home in bed while Jackson and I went to church. That's all we'll say about that except that I think he knows not to catch this "flu" bug again for a very, very long time.

Jackson. He is pretty cute... and I'm pretty sure he knows it.

Really putting on a show for the camera. And anyone else who will watch...

 

We ended the day having dinner with friends. The perfect little ending to a great weekend. Did I mention no work tomorrow!?!? Sweet dreams!